Crossley

Young American Actress

Mike Crossley

Gondwana bitches, I’m super-continental.
The Pentagon reclassified an octagon as a square—
 
This is my first mainstream comedy. The gist:
Life’s so lonely. I am rich fit and single
 
searching for a woman who can love me.
Texting Rihanna drunk
 
             @ LEVEL3 :–{)
This is irl btw—
 
Kurt Russell stops yelling to use the phone.
Don’t panic, it’s just Kim Cattrall
 
coming in from the rain, she’s so
motherfuckin boss.
 
The writer/director changes his mind:
 
1Everyone dies except the father
2I cry uncontrollably
space break

Young American Actress

I am master of my own domain.
 
Eating Mrs Fields cookies
the weight one gains appreciates.
 
I do stand still biking—anomalizing, to
anomalize tr.v. to buck up
 
Rock rough and tough w/yo afro puffs.
Avoid dates w/guys you don’t like
 
because your hand isn’t all that bad
sometimes tr.v.
 
INACCURATE PAPERWORK
is bad for the environment.
 
Apply online.
Invest money in the marketing
 
of a far reaching prescience.
I cannot talk to a machine
 
about things of great importance.
#I love You Rachel Maddow #I Love You LiveLinks
 
Thank you for tomorrow.
I am full of uncontainable.
 

MIKE CROSSLEY works in the IT department of a large film company.